Friday, 4 January 2013

More Worst Of From the Fanpop Forums

Forums over at Fanpop are true anarchy.  Anyone, including the ignorant and ill-informed can say anything.  Many of the postings are accidentally funny, particularly the ones about Van.  At least it makes a change from the high brow analysis of people like Greil Marcus.  Here's more of the worst of the forums at Fanpop.  Do yourself a favour and go over there and post.    

Van and Women

Ray_Le_Blanc   -   Why don't women like Van Morrison very much? I've had women tell me that he's too depressing or that he's not good-looking enough. Does he really have to look like Ricky Martin?

rodstarr2001   -   Well, I don't know much about Van's personality but there should be someone for every out there. Van probably hasn't met one that 'clicked' with him yet. I mean Money and status is no issue, and he's not ugly or anything, who knows?

Russell_Howard   -   I think Van's fan base is 90% men, particularly the obsessives who buy every album and go to as many concerts as they can. But then that's men for you. They are the ones who get obsessed with things like football, computer games, chess, etc.
Dr_Watson   -   Are you talking about his music? I think many women find his voice too gruff and his songs too masculine. I get a lot of this at the clinic.

Darango_Mustafa   -   Women aren't the subtle creatures we men are. We should delight in our maleness. Van should forget women. Has a woman ever bought a Van Morrison CD? Never!!!!
Karl_Vernoff   -   Let's face it - Van is portly. He's short and obese but he's our kind of short and obese. We love him.

Della401   -   This is a very interesting forum. Full of clever lines. Like a cafeteria in a college. Know what I mean?
Knight_Table   -   Rich men can always find beautiful young women to feign love. It's a game.

Junior_Gynther   -   What's love? Women want love, men want sex. They will each trade one to get the other. Men say "I love you" to get sex. Lots of men are suffering erectile dysfunction because they look at a lot of porn.
Cal_Avery   -   The rise of erectile dysfunction is linked to porn addiction. Has any man not seen porn? Has any 12 year old not seen porn? It's sad isn't it?

minivan   -   Van doesn't have a computer. He knows nothing about that kind of thing. Music is his life.
Reebus89   -   Pornography is killing us. The weight of all that filth is pushing us down. Try to give it up dear readers.

Curl_Maxx   -   What is a woman? Van writes beautiful love songs.
Roosevelt   -   Van's married right? To Michelle Rocca right? With two kids right? So what's this forum about right?

Lunch With Van

Dr Watson   -   When eating lunch with Van who would you like to be at the table with you? Bill Clinton? George Clinton? Jordan? Becks? My choice would be a security guard so if I offended the great man he could be restrained.

Kor_Svenson   -   I think lunch with Van, Al Gore, Colin Powell and Obama would be great.

Kristopfk_Silo   -   My list would be Van, Jesus, Bob Dylan, da Vinci, Tom Cruise (so I could throw food at him), Miles Davis AND Koko the chimp.
Moore_Kleevar   -   I would like to take a bunch of would-be suicides. Then Van and I could talk them out of it. Easy.

Howard_Yeates   -   I think Obama, Michael Jordan, Bob Dylan and Neil Young. Oh, and I would take David Beckham so I wouldn't feel so inadequate in such a group.
Della401   -   I would like to take my dog. I reckon Van favours the Roman style of eating - just throwing meat on the floor. My dog could clean it up.

Dave_Howard1961   -   Van doesn't want to talk to any of us. He's tired of fame. He doesn't "do" lunch.
Roosevelt   -   I'd like to see Van with all the Idol "stars". What a laugh when you compare his genius with their lack of talent. snort snort snort snort.

Worst Van Album

Ray_Le_Blanc   -    Ignoring the Bang reissues (they must make Van so annoyed!) I would say I don't have much time for A Period of Transition. What Van album do you like the least or hate the most or whatever?
Ray_Le_Blanc   -   I think You Win Again is a disappointment. I think all the Van "duet" albums are less than his best. Irish Heartbeat, Skiffle Sessions, etc. It seems he needs these musical excursions o keep his muse. But what we Van fans want is 100% Van.

Russell_Howard   -   I agree with Raymond Le Blanc. All the "duet albums" are pretty awful.  Don't like the country stuff much either. But he's got a great voice and can do anything he wants. He doesn't have to consult me.
Dr_Watson   -   I'm trying to buy every album and every single and EP put out by Van. I've found that there's gold on every album. But the albums I play the least are You Win Again, The Skiffle Sessions and Pay the Devil.
Karl_Vernoff   -   I think the albums where Van is playing with someone else, eg Georgie Fame, Dr John, Linda Gail Lewis, The Chieftains etc, are the worst. But those albums are better than a lot of performers' best work.
della401   -   A Period of Transition is terrible.

Jon_Jon_2000   -   You win Again is pretty bad, but all of his albums have some joy.
David_Howard61   -   You Win Again is bad. But there's always some good on a Van album.

Roosevelt   -   You Win Again is below par. Period of Transition isn't too great either. Some people dis Common One but I love it. Tell Me Something is awful, but is it a 'Van album'?

Gene_McNeally   -   I think You Win Again is his worst. But what about Van's 20 best albums. Absolutely fantastic.

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